I Get More Done Before 3:30 pm. . .

. . . than I'll get done for the rest of the week.

Guess what, guys? (What, blatherblahg?)

IT'S NOT RAINING TODAY!!!

Though I have relocated to a climate conspicuous for its absence of precipitation, even immortalized in song, there has been nothing but constant piddling drizzle for nigh on a week now. There was even talk of tornadoes and hail.

The folks here are aghast. But I'm not surprised. It's well documented that the gods hate me, so a literal cloud of gloom and doom following me out here really isn't too far afield from the norm. Joke's on the locals--I'm used to oppression and misery, just another day for me.

Anyhoo, today dawned bright and sunny, and I made haste yon nearest Ross discount store, for a thing or two. Well, $150 later, I nipped back across the way to FINALLY resolve my banking issues, then off to try out a yoga and tai chi class.

Pause for a word on Ross'--if you find yourself in the way of needing housewares, check here before anywhere else. The clothing you can take or leave, but the prices on crap like glasses, plates, cookware, organizers--it's insane. Example: over the door rack hanger thingy cost $18 at Target. Ross price is $9. And dumb stuff, like packs of hangers--it's just ridiculous what you can find there at cut rate prices.

I was THE ONLY ONE at this yoga class. Which would have normally made me very uncomfortable, but the instructor must have had some kind of magic mojo going on, because I never gave it a second thought. I'm not quite sure what all we did up in there, but I think some of it was Flow style, with some Hatha stretches. It was a good workout. She claims my hamstrings are not tight. I will be sure to discuss that with them tomorrow.

Even though I look like a fat slob (i.e. I am a fat slob), she was very surprised that I hadn't worked out in over year and that I hadn't been involved with yoga or dance. I tell you what I told her: any grace or body awareness I have I owe to my sensei. I don't like to mention that I studied with him for a variety of reasons, not the least of which being I feel like I'm an embarrassment to his art. But what little I can do stems from my years under his tutelage. A natural athlete I am not, but I might have picked up the art of listening to instructions along the way.

The tai chi class was a little different. Part of the point is to go slow, at which I am no good. (I wanna go fast! I wanna go fast!) And not just slow paced, but slow learning. Big focus on body awareness there, which one can never have enough of--evidenced quite clearly by my impatience to move past the slow stuff to. . . the what? That's the whole point of so many things. We are so busy rushing to get to whatever we think is the goal that we forget how to get there. Or we half ass it. Strange little class, but amusing. Some of the core moves made me feel like I was sneaky creeping around. Hee. No, it doesn't take much. Shut up.

Home again, and to two Christmas cards in the mailbox. Yay! I still need to go to a grocery store and buy some crap to make some junk for Christmas day dinner with my ree-lay-tive. Maybe I'll just bring booze.

I have one more appt later tonight then I'm Freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Except for the Christmas thing. Whoopee!

Too many words? Not enough pictures? Okay.


Colorform flowers!


Monkey wearing fez!


Kenny Loggins!



Michael McDonald!

And to round it out, two fellas who, inexplicably, haven't gotten around to asking me out. What could be the reason?

Perhaps they are discussing it right there. Somebody looks a little unsure of himself. Maybe Gerry is suggesting that they go get spruced up before making THAIR BEEG MOVE. Yes, I'm sure that's it.

In closing, Happy Holy Kwanzaa everybody. And really, don't get me anything for the holidays. Let me get you something: