When the Rapture Comes

...can I have your movie collection?

If anybody out there gets Raptured, please try to find some way to communicate back to us here on Earth.

Considering where I am, the Rapture could happen and I don't think anybody would notice. The population would remain relatively intact.

And considering the caliber of my family and associates, I don't think there's much chance that I'll be standing next to somebody and BLAMMO, they'll get Raptured and I'll look over and see a puddle of clothes or something.

(No offense to the people I know. If you read this, and feel like you will be/have been Rapturized, please leave me a comment. They have Interwebz in Heaven, right?)

All this End of Days talk can get confusing. I tend to think the Vikings were the most realistic in their expectations. Ragnarok pretty much has things ending the way the Norse saw life in general: bloody as hell and shit flying everywhere. I appreciate their consistency of approach. Though the link above has a nice little coda about repopulating the earth, the myths I remember reading pretty much ended with the world sinking into nothingness.

As far as Rapturization, these nice folks have some information to help you sort it out:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/43100302

As long as we are talking about things to worry about, the CDC wants you to be prepared for possible Zombie attacks:


http://emergency.cdc.gov/socialmedia/zombies_blog.asp

I would like to note that the CDC leaves out two vital survival requirements for a Zombie Apocalypse:

1. A sword (does not require reloading)
2. Bruce Campbell

Let's face it, without #2, you are pretty much toast.


Now, there IS something that is much more likely to happen around me. That is for someone to get Raptored. I don't think enough people are aware of the inherent dangers out there.

But you know, if you gotta go, gettting Raptored is a pretty cool way to do it.

Is it wrong of me to hope my pizza delivery boy is a sinner? I just really need some soda pop and cheesesticks right now. If he doesn't deliver on time, I might just have to rush down to the local church, get saved real quick, and then Rapture-beam into heaven to beat his ass for not bringing me my food.

And let me close with a video compilation of epic proportions. Henry H. does these amazing video edits, and I strongly recommend you check out anything he does on the YouTubez. I know the subject of this one is under a lot of public scrutiny right now, but let's not forget all the joy he has broughten unto us: